Teach Peace

Through my children's eyes I see peace. Through Their hearts I feel love. In their arms I feel content. -A. Renee

Children do not worry about the past nor stress about the future, they live constantly in the moment. Forever chasing butterflies and laying in the grass staring at the clouds in the sky. They are passionate, honest, loving and open. They can express every emotion possible on any given day yet when they close their eyes at night..they wake with a clean slate. They do not hold onto emotion as adults do. They do not hold onto anger nor stress and love others completely until they reach a certain age. 

Why is it that around 8 or 9 everything changes? The world hardens them..when they say that the sky is aqua, many start correcting them and say the sky is blue. When they want to play with dolls, they're told that those are for girls or that they are too old. WHO SAYS? WHO has the right to change their perspective..to tell them that everything they believe is incorrect? That their way of BEING is not acceptable? This is the first step of losing ourselves...of trying to fit in, of being unauthentic.

Many can disagree with me, and that's fine..as I live my life my way. I encourage my children to BE children...to dress how they want, to have fun wherever and whenever, to laugh and run and play...to eat breakfast for dinner and dinner for breakfast (because who made the rules of what to eat and when..I mean seriously?), to include the kids at school that aren't part of the "IN" crowd, because we are friends with kids because we like them, not because of what they wear or what new gadgets they have.  Sometimes I take my kids outside to SCREAM..yes to scream and let it out. Do you know what a release you get from screaming? We scream and giggle and then scream again...and its fantastic! Don't get me wrong, my house isn't a free for all...we have rules and bedtimes and chores. I am their mother yet I also have fun with them. By encouraging them to live fully, I hope that they will also encourage others to do the same. 

My children have taught me how to love unconditionally, how to be patient, how to have strength when I thought it wasn't possible and how to embrace each day. When I look at them, I see PEACE.

Take some time and spend with children, see how they play and live and love. Join them in the fun!

In my children's heart, they hold love. In my children's minds, they hold opportunity. In my children's hands, they hold the future. -A.Renee

The Difference a Year Can Make

A year ago my life was so different . I was complacent, living day to day but not enjoy life. Everything was a task to be done and most things seemed like a hassle. I had lost my drive, my spirit , my sparkle so to say. I was lost within my own body, a stranger to myself. All of the labels that others had given me were there, but to me they were just THAT.. Labels and nothing more.

The forst thing I did was I learned to say NO! I say no to things that do not align with who I am.. Things that I know are not good for me or my family get a firm and flat out NO.. And no explanation needed. If it doesnt feel right with my soul, it's a NO!

Fast forward a year. My life has changed by leaps and bounds. The first and most important change came from within. I took control of my life and my own happiness. It was difficult, I lost friends,distanced myself from certain family members(which was hard as h*ll.. Cuz family is blood, like there forever and here I am choosing not to be around a family member, just mark my forehead with a red X already )

 and chose to be surrounded with those that uplift me . I started living authentically again.. Full of honesty and without fears. I started to live from a place of love and when making choices asked myself: Is this in line with who I am? Am I doing this to please someone else or does it fill my soul with joy and happiness? My husband (whom i am separated from.. Happy to get that out there in the OPEN.. Whew.. Now lets move on) said he didn't know me anymore , that I have changed but in all actuality I just wanted to live authentically..so yes, I was a no longer the same person. I was growing/changing into who I knew I was on the inside. Is my life easy right now? Absolutely not, it's filled with uncertainty and the stress of trying to keep my children in a stable environment while dealing with adult issues.

 I'm not a man so don't really know how they think.. But I do know that as women, we are very intuitive, very in touch with our feelings, very soulful, and full of life and vibrancy.  So when someone tells you that you feel TOO much , I look at our world and tell them that the lack of feeling is what has got us where we are today. A world of chaos and turmoil, of people that are empty inside and always trying to live up to someone elses expectations yet are full of sadness.  People that are harming one another and themselves because they don't know how to love . 

So I am moving forward, one day at a time. I am surrounding myself with all that brings me joy.. I am living authentically and eager for all of the blessings that are headed my way.

So grateful for the lessons and for the storm that I'm in, because with this challenge comes great change.

Be YOU

Somehow in being a mother,wife,girlscout leader,friend,sister,daughter,cook,housekeeper,chauffeur..I lost myself. Everything else that I WAS took over who I REALLY WAS.... I sacrificed ME, in order to please everyone else and got caught up in being overly busy yet never really focusing 100% on any one thing. I also stopped doing the things that made me happy, the things that brought me joy. How did taking care of others trump taking care of myself?

I am not alone. Women tend to get caught up in "doing"... The act of "mothering" takes over our daily lives. We mother one another, we mother our kids sports teams and after school groups, we take on other people's problems as our own ( bad , BAD idea... As this is draining and just continuous negative energy), we mother our significant others. Nurturing is in our genes, it manifest itself in many different ways but as women we are the ONES that take care of things .. It's just how we are programmed. It is fine to mother others but we must remember to take care of ourselves . Taking care of YOU is so important and needed, after all if you don't take care of you, who will?

Some call it selfish, I call it self FULL. Being full of love for yourself, and taking the time to carve out some time daily to feed and nourish your mind, body and soul. What is it that you love to do? How would you spend 30 min to take care of your body? Or that same 30 min to nurture your soul? Think about it and BE about it.

Self love is one of the most important things we can do for ourselves , after all we must love our selves completely before we can completely love another.

namaste

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

” Max Ehrmann, "Desiderata"

Just Be

Just Be

(my mantra )

I have "Just Be" tattood on my wrist, as a reminder to allow things to unfold naturally. It is so easy to wish for a specific outcome, to continually push until you get what you want. In doing this, you go against the natural flow of the universe.  "Just Be" were the words my grandmother always used...to remind us as children to let things be as they were meant to.

Yoga is a way of life..more that just asanas (postures) and includes moral codes, called Yamas and Niyamas.  The one that I have been working on lately is called Tapas, which focuses on discipline and endurance . The discipline deals with the body, speech and the mind.  It is about controlling our language and thoughts as well as physical wants.

A million thoughts go thru our minds a day. Have you ever taken notice to how many are positive or negative thoughts? The goal with Tapas, is to think kind and loving thoughts as these thoughts become our words and these words become our actions. 

In focusing on Tapas , you may find that you distance yourself from friends or family that gossip or put others down. There are some that live constantly in this state of negativity and want to drag you in. This is the time to be firm and redirect your attention to something positive. Fasting, meditating and pranayama(breathing techniques) are all ways that you can practice self discipline and focus on positve actions, positiive speech and positive thinking.

Remember to take time for yourself and quiet your mind and to JUST BE.

Here are a couple of things to help you work on Tapas:

What techniques do you use to quiet your mind?

Recall a challenging situation where you were mindfull of the words you spoke

Kids Yoga

I was happy to be asked to help teach some children yoga at The Children's Museum at Navy Pier last Sunday.

My friend and fellow yogi Shalise from Blossfolds Yoga invited me to help some Chicagoland Girl Scouts earn a badge by learning how to be fit and healthy .

We had so much fun with the girls and even had a 22 month old join in on the fun. We incorporated poses such as octopus (partnering with another girl), lizard on a rock, bridge , boat, conch shell, tree and everyone's favorite pose..savasana.

Yoga has so many wonderful benefits for children . It teaches them how to focus, teaches patience and mindfulness as well as teaches them how to calm themselves in a stressful situation .

Thank You Blissfolds for asking me to help out with the girls . Such a wonderful way to spend the day!

(Photos ©Blissfolds and ©city yoga Chicago )

Yoga Heals

Little by little, Yoga has become more prominent in my life. What started out 10 years ago as me going to a pre-natal yoga class slowly became me attending classes weekly, teaching my kids and girl scouts yoga and finally me taking teacher training and sharing my joy of yoga with others.  Each of these steps over the years has re-connected me with myself..guiding me on my journey of self discovery and transition. 

It's funny, I never expected yoga to completely change my life, to turn my world upside down and to open my eyes to all around me. For the first time in years I can see things clearly, no longer looking at things from the outside in, feeling like a stranger in my own life. No longer feeling that I had to go with the flow...or just blend in. Instead making choices of which way to turn and which path to take. 

Let's face it, most of my life, I was the one that stuck out in the family. The earthy one, the hippie, the one who wouldn't eat meat,(nor touch it)the one that wanted to have babies and nurse them, the one that loved laying in the grass and enjoyed taking care of animals.This was in a family that said "eat what you are given and do as you are told", and "nursing is for animals" and gave no value to my difference of opinion,  so I became the shy, introverted child.  I grew up in a matriarchal family...my grandmother was the head of the family..with my mom and aunt right behind her..strong willed and stubborn. Hard working women, single mothers....no time to enjoy life nor all that it had to offer. Simply going thru each day without living life at its fullest. Maybe they didn't know how to live differently? How to slow down and LIVE, how to give and receive love openly, how to be Present in the moment. I chose a different path from them, because I wanted a different outcome. Not that their way was "wrong" but it wasn't "right" for me. We each have the ability to change old patterns and to move forward with our own lives, to enjoy our own journey. 

I don't want to live up to someone else's expectation of what I'm supposed to be. I AM ME.I'm Imperfectly Perfect at its best.  Confident, strong, silly, free spirited, random, passionate, loving, giving and am usually pretty extreme. I experience the highest of highs and the lowest of lows and sometimes all in the same day. It's just who I am, and I love me AS IS.

Yoga heals us from hurt and pain, helps us to open our hearts to all that is waiting for us. 

Namaste

Change

Change is inevitable...we can fight it, or we can embrace it and go along for the ride. We become so afraid of what might happen or what might go wrong, that sometimes we stop ourselves from growing, moving forward, transitioning to all that is waiting for us. What if, instead of being afraid of the storm, you stood in the middle of it and said "Let's Do This!" and dealt with the fear and uncertainty with great strength? We are all so quick to be thankful for what is on the other side of our struggles, but what would happened if you were grateful THRU the struggle , for it is the struggle itself that takes you to something better.

This past year has been quite the time of change for me in all areas of my life..some easy, some difficult but all the same, they are changes that are a part of my story, a part of my journey.  My dear friend told me that I can choose my own happy ending...and with her words I became empowered, once again finding my inner stregnth to make the choices that I needed to make in my life. One day at a time, one moment at a time...embrace the change and move forward.

Some of my favorite quotes about life changes:

"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger"
" When things didn't go her way, she adjusted her sails"
"Sometimes instead of waiting for the storm to pass, dance in the rain"
"You never know how strong you can be, until Strong is the only choice you have"

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-A