Yoga and Divorce
A story of love, marriage, divorce and finding myself. And Yoga, don't forget Yoga!
I joked with a friend that yoga caused me to get divorced. Not completely accurate but a lot of truth to it. My marriage had been in that “state”of stuck for a long time. We were roommates raising children and sharing a home for years. Our level of interest in one another was pretty low, it became more of a challenge to communicate with one another and doing things together was more of routine than anything else. Everything became routine. And as we all know, routine gets boring. Feeling lonely in a marriage is big NO NO. When two people are unhappy why do we feel the need to continue in that unhappiness? To force things for the sake of our children or stay together because of what others will think. Thus teaching our children that its ok to stay in an unhappy situation, to find comfort in unhappiness? We lived in a clouded haze for years, the days just melting into one another, year after year and led everyone else to think that all was perfect. After all, we had everything that should make someone happy. A well paying job, a nice home in an affluent neighborhood, 3 wonderful children and anything else that society deems necessary to obtain happiness. What was missing was our connection with one another: openness, trust, vulnerability and the ability to listen. These are all the foundation for a deeper connection, a connection of the souls.
Going through a yoga teacher training program made me aware of so much more. For the first time in a long time I felt like I was understanding who I was again. I was regaining my power and filling my heart and soul in a way that I never had before. This was amazing for me, yet not so amazing for a relationship that was not so stable and which suddenly made my husband feel like he no longer knew who I was. I felt kind of weird saying it, but it was true. He thought his wife had an alter ego or was in need of therapy but in actuality this is who I had always been deep down it side. The "real me" had been covered up and hidden while I became a person that I was supposed to be . I had lost myself.
I had friends ask how I was so calm and positive during my divorce. The only response I had was: Yoga. I'm not an expert on anything, so don’t expect any “aha” moments here, just my truth. I am 43 44 year old mom of 3 that decided she wanted to change her life and had enough courage to do so. Somehow I didn't go completely nuts or become depressed and I owe it to Yoga. So over the next few posts I'll be sharing, my ups and downs and how Yoga somehow kept me sane during my divorce.
Grab a glass of wine and turn the page.
